Today I feel like my heart is overflowing with joy! We have our three babies all together at home at last! The last few days have been long for sure. I was discharged on Thursday, and tearfully had to leave our little guy in the NICU. The Dr. wanted to make sure that he received a full 7-day course of two different kinds of antibiotics. It was good that we were able to go home and reconnect with B and T, as much as would would have rather left altogether. Maybe that will make this whole transition better. They had come in to see him at the hospital and hadn't been too impressed. Then they got anxious to have him home so maybe this extra mommy and daddy time filled their tanks a little.
So, the last few days I tried to go over there as much as possible. I spent most afternoons snuggling him skin to skin - the hospital happened to be huge advocates of kangaroo care, and that became my best friend! Since I am trying to breastfeed I tried to do that as much as possible and he has done pretty well going back and forth between the bottle and breast so far. I am nervous about whether or not he'll keep it up when we get home since he is used to at least a few bottles a day, but we'll see. It has been a really wonderful way to bond since I have been feeling pretty sad that I haven't been able to do much of his care giving during his first week of life. I can't even begin to explain how excited I am to have him home. I adore that little boy so very much.
Miraculously enough, Will seems to have recovered entirely from his rough start. The dr. said that he doesn't think he will have any long term effects from the cord being around his neck or tummy or the fluid in his lungs which caused him to need assistance immediately with breathing. He also said that the infection in the placenta should be entirely taken care of with these antibiotics. His breathing is good and he doesn't seem to have any jaundice at this point. I can't tell you how amazing it was to hear all of this after seeing the heart rate in the 50's and the pale, limp infant they were wheeling out of the operating room one week ago. The strange thing is that no one can give me any explanation for what would have caused these things, nor why he has done so well. I truly believe it is a miracle and a true answer to all of the prayers which people have been praying for him through this entire pregnancy. The doctor told us to start saving for Harvard or Princeton. I wanted to give this guy a hug...but instead I just tearily thanked him for saving our little boy's life. Honestly, everyone at the hospital was amazing - we had a wonderful experience, and we are so glad that God nudged us to go there (where there was a great NICU) long before we knew we were going to need it.
So, now that he is home, real life begins. I am still extremely sore. I didn't realize that C-sections hurt so badly, and I have been feeling a bit discouraged that at a week out and on pain meds there is still constant pain. Will is definitely worth it all x 100, but I just hope that I can heal soon so I can do a good job taking care of our now 3 (!) kids. Slowing down doesn't come easily to me. I feel like God has been teaching me greatly about trusting him, and I am sure this is all part of the continuing lesson. Less of me, and more of Him.
Will loves to eat, can sleep through the utter chaos of his siblings and is happy being held constantly. I really think all of this has given me a new appreciation for every snuggle and just the newborn stage in general. I had forgotten how amazing it is. I love his sweet newborn smell, how he roots when he is hungry. I love watching the big kids be so precious with him. I just kind of wish I could freeze frame things for a bit to soak it all in. God has been so very good to us in bringing us from one of the scariest nights of our life to one of the most perfect times - and all in only a week!
Thanks for your prayers and for listening to our story. I am so amazingly blessed by my wonderful husband and three precious kids! If I didn't have this abdominal pain, I'd probably need to pinch myself! Hey - maybe that's why it's there! :)
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